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Pick Up the Phone Booth and TSC

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Thorn:
So a short while ago I was introduced to the magic that is Pick Up the Phone Booth and Die, Aisle, and Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle.

And they were hilarious.

Then it hit me that we already had Horrible Misfortune topics on TSC -- namely, RPG's posts in his Murdering Topics (the Horrible Misfortune Game topic was different). Said topics were tossed into the Moron Archives and are now dry-rotting in Sonic '06 Appreciation Land. So I figure we should start this up again, only with the formatting changed to make it a group activity in the hopes of it not being moved to S'06 AP again.

If you're unfamiliar with all of the magic text adventures I mentioned, allow me to get you up to speed. You are presented with a short explanation of the setting/situation you find yourself in. As with any text adventure, you state a verb and, if necessary, the object(s) to which the verb is applied. You then continue with the story. In these games, though, the story always ends right after you make your first action. A good 90% or so of the possible actions end badly for the player, with the occasional subversion thrown in for good measure. So, you provide the verbs, and any TSCer with the ability to modify posts creates the result -- perhaps more than one result if more than one person has a clever outcome. A lot of the responses in this topic tend to be in-jokes based around TSC members, so if you don't get it, it's not your fault -- heck, the consequence might simply be unfunny to begin with.


You are at the first ever TSC Convention, on the lawn of flyby's house. It's a bright, sunny day, with only a few clouds in the sky. TSCers from around the world have gathered and are talking about... stuff. To the north lies flyby's house. To the east is a picket fence. To the south is a street. To the west TSCers are congregating.

A phone booth inexplicably sits in the middle of the lawn.

Waxwings:
>speed dial random TSC'er

You enter the phone booth and end up calling DsS. You wonder what the purpose of the call is, seeing as he is at the convention. Before you can think of a reason, a bullet whizzes through your skull; Quartz is nearby and had heard DsS's voice coming from the phone booth, causing him to instinctively shoot in your direction. Of course, all shots aimed at anybody rebound at DsS per TSC law, so Quartz hits his target. Luckily for him, you're too much of a nobody for anybody to notice your death, so he gets off scot free.

*You spend the rest of time as a corpse in a phone booth*

Stefan:
>ignore phone booth

Now, the phone booth was the cause of death in the original game; why would it be any different here? Against all logic, you ignore the phone booth. As you turn your back to it, GerbilSoft leans on the opposite side. The booth wasn't anchored to the ground quite as well as he thought, though, and it topples backwards onto you, crushing you under its weight.

*You should've played the original game*

Maru Kiba:
What if you were on a deserted island, and found 7 phone booths, and ominously they all ring. When you go to pick it up, no one is there, but it still rings. What you do?

douglas:
> west

You head over to the groups of TSCers talking to the west. Due to sun glare, you can't make out who they are until you're right next to them... oh, boy. You've wandered into a furry meeting. PPA and Koshi are pissed that you are intruding on their private meeting: after all, PPA's insecure about his furriness when in front of non-furries. You apologize profusely, but it's not enough; PPA throws a punch, and the two of you begin to fight. After a quick scuffle, you come out victorious, though not unscathed.

Later that night, as you go to bed, you check up on your injuries. You have a few bruises here and there, but you seem alright for the most part, save a spot on your shoulder where you appear to have been bit by PPA... the blood still hasn't clotted. You dab some hydrogen peroxide on it, cover it with a bandage, and go to bed.

When you wake up, you freak out. There's spots of orange fur growing from the backs of your hands, your nails are unusually long, your ears are stretched out... you've caught the furry virus. You cover it up well enough for a few days, but it eventually grows out of control. Weeks later, you could pass for a superhero: agile as a furry, improved hearing and eyesight, an incredible sense of smell... but none of it matters. You're a social pariah due to a pheromone your body releases that causes those nearby to think "eww furry". Your parents, your girlfriend, your friends... they all reject you. You can't get a job due to affirmative action not being applicable to different species. Worst of all, PPA and Koshi, the only fellow furries you know, won't take you in.

*You spend the rest of your life alone, save the ticks and fleas that take residence in your fur*

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